Never, not in a million years, did I think Utah Jazz fans would be at the top of my Shitlist for D-baggiest NBA fans ever. I thought for certain that top spot would forever be reserved for the fat, hairy truckers, hookers, and hicks that cheer on the Sacramento Kings- fans whom, thanks to the early-2000′s, I regard with more disgust than Celtics
fans. At least Celtics fans have the championships to back up their trash talk. Sacramento, which I lovingly call the armpit of space and time, has neither a championship nor a front office capable of bringing it’s long-lost championship dreams to fruition.
And let’s be real here, to say that I hate Jazz and Sacramento fans more than Celtics fans is saying a lot, because I am a Lakers-till-I-die kind of girl. I’m a cut-me-and-I-will-bleed-purple-and-gold kind of girl.
But now it’s May 29, 2010, and here I am, in New York City, seething with disgust for a team who’s former owner I generally thought of as truly a one-of-a-kind guy in a sports world ruled by the bottom line mentality, a Mormon so devout he never attended Sunday games for the team he OWNED. Here I am, hating Jazz fans, the only fans in the history of the NBA that I would have once told you actually had class and truly deserved to win a championship.
Do I think Lakers fans deserve championships? No. Hell no, but we demand them, because we’re a bunch of bitchy Angelenos, most of us who have nothing worse to bitch about than traffic on the 405 or how the lady at the tanning salon gave us an over-priced, streaky spray-on. When we’re winning, we show up to games with celebrities, agents, rockstars, and shell out absurd money for crap tickets, because we can. When we’re losing (2006-2007, anyone?), no one shows up except for the diehards and Jack Nicholson. Hell, when we’re losing like that, we can’t even rely on Mr. Kobe Bryant himself to show up. In a losing season, I’d bet my life on him being the first to board a jet plane and get the Hell out of LA. Make no mistake, when we’re good, we’re goooood, which allows Jerry Buss & Co. make a killing off our backs, because our prime seats are filled with prima-donnas. These ladies and gents who raise ticket prices by using season tickets to be seen, they don’t know shit about basketball though. If you asked one of them how effective the triangle was against any given team on any given night, they’d probably respond with something like, triangle? I don’t know about any love triangles, you’ll have to ask my publicist about that.
Now Jazz fans, they show up win or lose. As a Laker fan, I like to joke that it’s only because there is absolutely nothing else to do in Utah, and while it is kind of true, watching a team day in and day out that you know will probably never win a championship is like going to a dead end job day in and day out, only to be abused by your co-workers, fetch coffee, and never be promoted. These Jazz fans, they don’t riot and burn up your revamped downtown area. How could they riot over a championship win if they’ve never won it, anyways?
They used to be classy folks in a shit-storm of fans who think it’s their God-given right to be judge, jury, and hangman over foul calls, trade deadlines, and salary caps. I’ll be the first to admit half of LA can’t keep their damn checkbooks balanced (or if they are, they’re paying someone to do it), so I don’t know why they think they’re qualified to talk about luxury taxes and full mid-level deals.
Jazz fans stick by their team through thick and thin. They hate my Los Angeles Lakers with a passion- and I kind of love them for it. In fact, Jazz fans used to be the only people I would allow to openly hate on the Lakers, because given our history of whooping their asses, they’ve earned it. Just like their former owner, Larry Miller, Jazz fans are devout. In a state that doesn’t have beaches or celebrities or an NFL team- or even any college teams that spark for more than two seasons in a row, Jazz fans remain steady a steady stream. They show up to every game. They cheer their hardest. They deal with bad season after bad season or worse, good season after good season, only to have their asses handed to them in the play-offs by the Lakers. They used to be my favorite NBA fans to jeer against, but then two “ignorant,” as Reggie Miller called it, ladies decided to show up court side wearing shirts emblazoned with a word apiece: “Fisher” + “Lied.”
As you can see, RogueRanters, I had (and someday, might regain) respect for Jazz fans. They were the best fans in the league, no doubt about it.
That devout and earnest owner, Larry H. Miller, died last year, and along with him went everything that the Utah Jazz used to stand for: hardwork, respect, and kindness, which is a shame. I liked to think that Jazz fans would honor his legacy by maintaining their classy demeanor.
For me, I remember the day he died quite vividly. I remember reading about his complications stemming from type 2 diabetes and thinking to myself, the NBA has just lost one of the last good ones it will ever see. LHM wasn’t out getting busted for DUI’s, and he wasn’t under suspicion for insider trading. He was more than a decent owner, he was a decent guy. But more than I remember him passing, I remember when he was kind enough to let Derek Fisher leave his contract so that he could move to a city where his daughter, stricken with a rare, malignant eye tumor, could receive the best treatment possible.
Fisher re-signed with the Lakers at a loss of $8,000,000, to be in a city where his daughter could receive the best possible treatment, to be in the city that originally signed him from the draft, to be in a city and play for a team that was .500 at best.
Why in Gods name would Utah expect Derek Fisher to be loyal to them, anyways? The dude clearly said, upon signing the deal with you guys, that he wasn’t exactly happy to be there. Why would he be? It’s Utah, for Christ’s sake!
People say that before his death, LHM speculated whether or not he’d been manipulated by Derek Fisher. Let me tell you this, LHM not only saved $8,000,000, but wound up with a better team led by one of the best true point guards in the league, Deron Williams. Do you really think LHM wanted to spend $22,000,000 on a second string guy?
The only reason Fisher does so well in Los Angeles is because the triangle offense Phil Jackson is so fond of doesn’t require a true point guard. I love Derek Fisher to pieces, and while he is definitely a clutch player, let’s not call a spade a spade: dude is getting old and isn’t quite the performer that he used to be.
I get that Utah fans are hurt that he signed with the Lakers. Had he signed with any other team, I wouldn’t be writing this today.
But he did.
However, for two young women to show up courtside wearing shirts insinuating that he lied about his daughter having cancer just to go back to LA? Words can’t begin to describe how absolutely un-classy that is. His daughter having a rare form of cancer is fact and reason enough for him to ask to be let go of his contract. LHM saving $8,000,000 and gaining one of the best point guards in the league is reason enough for him to let Derek leave.
Like I said, I used to have a lot of respect for Utah fans, except, a couple of bad apples had to ruin their reputation on live television. Then more than a few fans hit the interwebs spewing their shit about Fisher, and all of the respect that I had for their poor, championship-less souls just evaporated- Poof! Outside of bitter, lousy Jazz fans pounding the message boards, spewing their ignorant bullshit about him, I’ve never once heard anything to the contrary of Derek Fisher being a nice guy. Not once, and when you grow up immersed in all things sports-related, you almost expect to hear shitty things about players these days. Sex scandals, rape accusations, concealed and unregistered firearms “up in da club”, drugs, money laundering, gambling debts . . .
I swear, I’ve never heard a single bad thing about Derek Fisher, and I suspect that no PR person, in these days of warp-speed technology, is savvy enough to gloss-over anything that Derek Fisher might do wrong. Derek Fisher was placed on the “Nice Guy” pedestal long ago, which means rag mags like the Enquirer and sites like PerezHilton only work that much harder to find fault with him. Everyone is always gunning to take down Derek Fisher, because no one wants to believe that a nice dude can exist in professional sports.
Well, Derek Fisher has made a skeptical believer out of me, because if the worst thing that Derek Fisher ever did was to head back to the team he’d played for most of his career so that he could live in one of the few cities where his daughters cancer could be treated, and do all of this at an $8,000,000 loss, well, damn, then I think he’s earned his place up on that pedestal.
Jazz fans, you can hate him, because he’s a Laker, but don’t hate him for doing what’s best for his family. You’re making a mockery out of LHM’s legacy, and as Bill Simmons says:
See, here’s what you get when you boo Fisher, Utah fans …
1. Bad karma. Goes without saying.
2. You just look stupid. Like you have no idea what actually happened. Fisher didn’t betray you by jumping to a conference rival. The Lakers were floundering at the time.
3. You bristle every time a media member calls you the most (fill in one: bitter/angry/hostile/vicious) fans in the NBA. This illogical Fisher vendetta helps you on this front … how?
My advice as a neutral party: Let the Fisher thing go. It’s creepy and ill-conceived.
So, Jazz fans, shut your pie holes and try harder next year. Don’t sulk, it’s unbecoming.
